Rights of Husband and wife ( Answered / تمت الإجابة )

Here is where we will post all your questions and answers to the Imam a.s

Moderator: Shana

Post Reply
User avatar
Posts: 109
Joined: Sun Jul 12, 2020 12:50 pm

Question: In the name of Allah, the Most Beneficient, the Most Merciful.
May Allah swt send His peace and blessings upon Muhamed and the Family of Muhamed, the Imams and Mahdis.
Assalam Allaykum Wa Rahmat Allah Wa Baraktu, my Master Imam Ahmed Al-Hassan.
What are the rights and obligations of husband and wife toward each other? How should they both treat each other in order that they may please Allah swt, be able to ascend together and have a successful relationship?
O kind father, what advice do you give to those who are about to get married?

بسم االله الرحمن الرحیماللهم صلي على محمد وأل محمد الأئمة والمهدیین وسلم تسلیمًا كثیرا السلام علیكم ورحمة االله وبركاته سیدي و مولاي أحمد الحسن
ما هي حقوق و واجبات كل من الزوج والزوجة تجاه الأخر؟ و كیف یجب أن یعامل كل منهما الأخر لكي یرضیا االله سبحانه و تعالى و یرتقیا معا و تنجح علاقتهما؟
بما تنصح أیها الوالد الحنون المقبلین على الزواج؟
فیروز الخولي, مصر

Fayrouz Elkholi, Egypt

Answer: In the Name of Allah, the Abundantly Merciful, the Intensely Merciful.
All praises belong to Allah the Lord of the Worlds.
O Allah, send Your prayers upon Muhammad and the Family of Muhammad, the Imams and the Mahdis.
Peace, mercy, and blessings of Allah be upon you.
{And of His signs is that He created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquillity in them; and He placed between you affection and mercy} [Holy Qur’an ]30:21
The rights and duties of the husband and wife towards each other:
Unfortunately, many men, especially in the Arab and Islamic countries, believe that it is a must and incumbent upon the wife, and that she is compelled against her will, to do everything her husband requests from her or commands her to do regarding the house and the children. But many people do not know that the only right which the husband can demand from his wife, is Nikah (intercourse), and it is an obligation upon the wife, she must make it available for her husband whenever he demands it. Rather, it is incumbent upon her to try to show love and affection for her husband everyday so that she may move his feelings towards her. And it is extremely forbidden that she refuses or slackens
or prevents her husband from her, rather if she does that the Angels of the Earth and the Heavens will curse her, God forbid.
As for the rest of the matters. such as disciplining/raising the children and feeding them for example, and taking care of them, or the rest of the house work, are not an obligation upon the wife. And she can abstain from practicing those tasks, rather she for example can ask for a reward/payment in exchange for those tasks. And this is a right which has been granted for her by the religion of the True Islam. Because when both sides made a contract, they made a contract in a paper or orally on one matter, and that is Nikah (intercourse) and Tamatu’ (pleasure), and originally it is called “Nikah contract”, and it was not a contract to raise children or take care of the house for example or any of the other matters which are known to everyone.
As we said, the wife is not obligated to do those tasks/chores, and she does not take any sins if she refuses to do those tasks. But if she was gracious enough and did those tasks, without anything in return, for the sake of Allah, then she will have a great reward with Allah swt, which is a reward that only Allah swt can enumerate for her. But in this case, the right of the husband to demand intercourse and pleasure will change, because when the wife does the house work or the daily house chores like cleaning and cooking, she will be exhausted by the end of the day.
There is a command for the fiancé, and that is that he must agree with his fiancee about this matter, meaning taking care of the children and breastfeeding them and doing the house work which is known to everyone, before they make the Nikah contract. If the fiancee agreed to the conditions of her fiancé, then it will be incumbent upon her to do those tasks, just as intercourse and pleasure are incumbent upon her. And if she refuses that, here the fiancé or the man has the choice to leave his fiancee or to continue with her and marry her upon the Nikah and Tamatu’ contract, or upon a part from what they agreed to according to the agreement of both sides.
Here there is also a right for the husband when the wife refuses to do some or all the house chores, and that is that he has the right to marry a second wife, but on the condition that this second wife agrees to all the man’s conditions which the first wife refused.
As for the believing married couples who believe in what we say from the verses of Allah The Almighty and the path of Muhammad and the Family of Muhammad sawas, who were married before this statement came out and before this matter was clarified, then they can either re-do the agreement, or leave the matter as it was, keeping in consideration the love/affection and the humane mercy, and to not use the spouse for personal interests.
And from the duties of the husband towards his house and wife and children, is that he makes available for them an honorable living and to provide for them their necessary needs of food and drink and clothes, and the rest of the urgent needs, in a reasonable way within the limits, and without wastefulness nor extravagance .

And if days pass and the husband did not spend on his wife, the expense of that time period would remain in his liability whether she asks for it or not.
And I would like to clarify something which is extremely important and extremely wonderful, concerning the justice of the Creator The Almighty. And that is that the hard work/effort which the father or the one who raises, exerts on his household, is a blessing from the blessings of Allah the Almighty..that Allah makes in his children goodness and blessings, and makes the selves and the souls which are raised from the sweat (the hard work) of the father incline towards goodness more than evil, and it makes and strengthens ardency and magnanimity and continuous love and mercy towards their parents within them, except the ones whose clay are impure, and refuge is in Allah.
So from here, my beloved pure believing sons, I strongly urge you to work and strive to feed your children from your efforts and [from the work of] your own arms. And sustenance is upon Allah the One The Indivisible The Sustainer. And all praises belong to Allah the Lord of the worlds.
And let all the men know that whoever does not spend on his children from money which he earned from his work and effort, should not await any goodness from his progeny towards him, because when the father of the children spends on them from money which is not his or which he did not rightfully earn, or when someone else spends on them, Allah The Almighty will lift from their hearts the mercy and love towards their father. Indeed this life has a scale which The Just, The Almighty, The Abundantly Merciful, The Intensely Merciful, weighs with. And all praises belong to Allah the Lord of the World.
Ahmed Al-Hassan
Jamadi Al Thani / 1437 A.H.

الجواب بسم االله الرحمن الرحیم
الحمد الله رب العالمین
اللهم صل على محمد وآل محمد الأئمة والمهدیین وسلم تسلیما السلام علیكم ورحمة االله وبركاته
}َوِمْن آََیاِتِه أَْن َخلََق لَُكْم ِمْن أَْنُفِسُكْم أَْزَواًجا ِلَتْسُكُنوا إِلَْیَها َوَجَعَل َبْیَنُكْم َمَو َّدًة َوَرْحَمًة{ :حقوق وواجبات الزوجین تجاه بعضهم
للأسف یعتقد كثیر من الرجال وخصوصًا في البلاد العربیة والإسلامیة أن الزوجة یجب علیها او واجب علیها او رغمًا عنها ان تفعل كل شيء یطلبه زوجها منها او یأمرها به بخصوص البیت والأطفال. ولا یعلم الكثیر ان الحق الوحید الذي یستطیع الزوج ان یطالب به من الزوجة هو النكاح ..وهذا واجب على الزوجة ان توفره لزوجها متى ما طلبه.. بل علیها واجب ان تحاول التودد لزوجها كل یوم حتى تحرك مشاعره تجاهها.. ویحرم علیها حرمة شدیدة بل تلعنها ملائكة الأرض والسماء .والعیاذ باالله إن رفضت او تكاسلت او امتنعت عن زوجها
واما باقي الأمور مثل تربیة الأطفال و إطعامهم على سبیل المثال ورعایتهم او باقي الأعمال المنزلیة، هي لیس واجب على الزوجة، وهي تستطیع ان تمتنع عن ممارسة هذه الأعمال بل حتى تستطیع على سبیل المثال أن تطلب أجر مقابل هذه الاعمال، وهذا حق لها قد كفله دین الإسلام الحنیف، لأن حین تعاقد الطرفین تعاقدوا في ورقة اوتعاقدوا شفویًا على أمر واحد هو النكاح والتمتع، وهو في الأساس اسمه عقد نكاح، ولم یكن عقد تربیة الاطفال على سبیل المثال او الأعتناء بالمنزل وغیرها من هذه .الامور المعروفة للجمیع
وكما قلنا ان الزوجة غیر مجبرة على القیام بهذه الأعمال وهي لا تأثم على رفضها لهذا ..لكن إن تكرمت وقامت بهذه الأعمال مجانًا في سبیل االله فلها اجر عظیم عند االله سبحانه وتعالى لن یستطیع سوى االله سبحانه وتعالى احصائه لها ..وفي هذه الحالة سوف یتغیر الأمر في حق الزوج بالمطالبة بالنكاح والتمتع، لأن حین تقوم الزوجة بالعمل في المنزل او بالاعمال البیتیة الیومیة .مثل التنظیف او الطبخ سوف تكون منهكة في نهایة النهار
و یوجد امر للخاطب ان یتفق مع خطیبته على هذا الأمر، اي الاعتناء بالأطفال او ارضاعهم او القیام بالأعمال البیتیة المعروفة للجمیع، قبل القیام بعقد النكاح. إن وافقت المخطوبة على شروط خطیبها یكون واجب علیها ذلك، حاله حال النكاح والتمتع. وإن رفضت ذلك، هنا الخاطب اوالرجل له ان یترك خطیبته او یستمر معها ویتزوجها على عقد النكاح والتمتع او على جزء من ما .اتفقوا علیه حسب اتفاق الطرفین
وهنا ایضًا یوجد للزوج حق حین ترفض الزوجة القیام ببعض او كل الاعمال المنزلیة، وهو الزواج من ثانیة، لكن بشرط ان .تكون هذه الزوجة الثانیة موافقة على جمیع شروط الرجل التي امتنعت الزوجة الأولى عنها
وبالنسبة للمتزوجین المؤمنین بما نقول من ایات االله عز وجل و نهج محمد وآل محمد ص قبل صدور هذا الأمر و تبیانه، فلهم ان یعیدوا الأتفاق او یتركوا الامر على حاله السابق مثل ما كان، مع مراعاة المودة والرحمة الإنسانیة وعدم استغلال الطرف .الأخر لمصالح شخصیة
ومن واجبات الزوج تجاه بیته وزوجته وأطفاله هو ان یوفر لهم العیش الكریم ویوفر لهم أحتیاجاتهم الضروریة مثل المأكل .والمشرب والملبس وباقي الاحتیاجات الملحة حسب المعقول ضمن الحدود وعدم التبذیر والإسراف
.ولو فاتت أیام ولم ینفق الزوج على زوجته بقیت في ذمته نفقة تلك المدة سواء طالبته بها أو سكتت عنها
وأحب ان أبین أمر في غایة الأهمیة والروعة في عدالة الخالق عز وجل... هو ان كد الأب او المربي على آل بیته هو نعمة من
نعم االله عز وجل... ان یجعل االله في عیاله الخیر والبركة ویجعل الأنفس والارواح المتربیین من عرق جبین الأب تمیل الى الخیر اكثر من الشر.. ویجعل ویقوي في احشائهم الغیرة والشهامة والتودد المستمر والرحمة تجاه والدیهم، الا من كانت طینته ..نجسة والعیاذ باالله
فمن هنا ابنائي الأحبة الأطهار المؤمنین احثكم بقوة على العمل والجهاد لإطعام ابنائكم من جهدكم وذراعكم ... والرزق على االله .الواحد الأحد الرزاق . والحمد الله رب العالمین
ولیعلم جمیع الرجال ان من لا یصرف من ماله على أطفاله الذي یحصل علیه من عمله وتعبه، لا یرتجى خیراً تجاهه من
ذریته، لأن الأبناء حین یصرف علیهم والدهم بأموال لیست أمواله او لم یتعب بها، او یصرف علیهم انسان اخر، سوف یرفع االله عز وجل من قلوبهم الرحمة والمحبة تجاه والدهم. إن هذه الحیاة لها میزان یزن به العادل عز وجل الرحمن الرحیم. والحمد .الله رب العالمین
أحمد الحسن
جمادي الثاني ١٤٣٧
Every day is Ashura, and every land is Karbala
Post Reply